When someone steals your heart, you really don’t want the portion they stole back. What you want is for them to keep it safe. You really don’t want them to stomp on it or torture it, and you really, really don’t want them to kill it by killing themselves (wholly or bit-by-bit). When someone steals a bit of your heart you want the best for them. You want them to be happy and to live a long time.

When someone steals a bit of your heart they steal a bit of your soul, too. They may not want to, or even try to, or even know they did, but they do. It’s not easy to live with a bit your heart and soul possessed by someone else. You hate it when they hurt – you can feel that hurt and there’s nothing you can do. You want the best for them and when they don’t choose that, a bit of your heart and soul you retain dies.

When someone owns a bit of your heart and soul, there’s absolutely nothing you can do to keep them safe – those bits aren’t yours anymore. You really have to trust that other someone to keep your heart and soul alive.

The thing is, once you let someone steal a bit of your heart (and soul) you can’t exactly turn the love you have for them off. It just doesn’t work that way.

Here my watch; my geas:
This centaur the Friesian’s guardian.
Soon, very soon that mare runs of her own —
Even the pasture is too small
I see.

You say you are
chief of sinners.
If I know I’m worse,
is that prideful?


aBandoned cheese factory
recipes sold
hand-cheddaring’s gone
remember the taste

The pierced lamb stands
on the throne under the star
where the young child lay

From His side poured blood and water.
John saw it and his witness is true.

each time i touch your back
that knot —
tension?
anger?
or simply sadness?

at night I glide my hand over your bare back
this is how true love feels

Lifting that roast fowl
from pan to plate I rip my back
Turkey’s revenge?

ice silently drips from the eaves
only the bells for Mass are louder


the peal of the bells
wakes me hours before they
begin to ring for Lauds


the bells of Vigils
keep me awake long after
we finish chanting


in the refectory
spilling the salt is louder
than a bomb blast


I miss the quiet
after I leave the abbey
not just the silence


you are there in the
shadows even when I am
not thinking of you


i am your captive
oh god
do i pull near or
do i push away
your face


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